Why I Don’t Want to Be Full

“What are we arguing about again?” my husband asked. After some discussion, we came to the conclusion.

We were arguing because I was bored. Being bored makes me rather grumpy.

How about you?

Some of us Type A people believe relaxation involves a checklist. Doers tend to associate a full schedule with a full heart. When we see margin and have no way to fill it, we tend to get frustrated.

Being Glad for Gaps

My tendency to desire busyness and fullness is why it surprised me when I caught myself thinking recently that I was glad for some recent lacks in life.

  • -For a season, I couldn’t find things to fill my checklist. That margin made room for some of the Bible Study and writing I treasure most.
  • -There was a time when we didn’t know anyone nearby. Our open evenings gave space to connect with each other more…and to start inviting friends over.
  • -Changing dynamics made me feel like I wasn’t as invested in anything. God gave the margin to invest in new people and ministries.

As hard as it can be when chapters end, doors close, and the heart longs for something more, what we gain is time to be filled, instead of always trying to fill. 

Gaining Capacity

Susie Larson describes this in one of my favorite books, Your Sacred Yes. She shares about times of saying no, pulling back, and changing course…plus a part of obeying God many of us Type A people struggle with:

We feel like we should have full schedules, commitments, and plans- or else we’re wasting the time God has given us. But… Click To Tweet

Writing about time in her life when others suggested she should be filling more of her time with service activities, Susie Larson explains:

“Waiting and watching for the Lord, and then following His lead, became the most important and significant things I could do with my moments and days.”

Gaining the capacity of time and space in life to wait on and follow God’s lead may have looked like a lack of work and service ethic to others, but it was actually a blessing.

It is a shame to have a life so full, that there isn't space for new people and new opportunities…or for new things God wants to lead us into. Click To Tweet

What a blessing today to think of the friends, opportunities, and memories made because God gave me open time and empty spaces I didn’t think I wanted!

Is this something you struggle with too? How do you come to appreciate added capacity?


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11 Replies to “Why I Don’t Want to Be Full

  1. I agree, I used to want to cram every moment of my day full, but more and more I am coming to appreciate those times when there is a bit of space. It is important to be able to pause and reflect on how God wants us to be spending our time instead of just keeping going.

  2. I had to laugh at your opening “What are we arguing about again?” How many times have my hubby and I asked the same question? I keep myself too busy! Thank you for the gentle reminder to slow down!

  3. Fresh insight, Bethany. I’m a type A personality too. So I relate to the checklist and all that comes with it. But what a new perspective to realize that sometimes lack and not being full is really a good thing.

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